Twins Jacob and Blake Nelson, 5, vie for the attention of their mother, Katie, on a bed rest regimen as she awaits birth of twins for a Colorado couple. That has created new parenting challenges for both Katie and her husband, Scott (right). (Globe Gazette photo by Arian Schuessler)
This time, however, the twins she is carrying will go home with someone else.
The 32-year-old Mason City woman is a surrogate mother for a Colorado couple. Katie and her husband, Scott, 38, are parents of twin sons, Jacob and Blake, who were born New Year’s Day 2002.
“I wanted to make a difference in someone’s life,” said Katie, from her hospital bed at Mercy Medical Center-Des Moines, where she was placed on bed rest Aug. 4.
“I enjoyed being pregnant,” she said. “I didn’t look at it as being an inconvenience.”
It took a few years to convince Scott that surrogacy was the thing to do.
“I kept saying no,” he said. “I didn’t feel comfortable with it. I thought what would the kids think? I didn’t know what other people would think. It just seemed odd to me.”
Ultimately, Scott agreed. He said he didn’t want his wife to have regrets later on for not having done it.
In February 2006, Katie located an agency for surrogate parenting on the Internet. She chose the Center for Surrogate Parenting (CSP) Inc. in Encino, Calif. because of its ongoing support for surrogate mothers.
After completing a form they received in the mail, Scott and Katie had several other hurdles to jump, including a telephone interview with a mental health professional through the agency and a psychological test for Katie.
Katie also needed to obtain permission from her personal physician to go ahead with the process and from her employer, North Iowa Vocational Center (NIVC), where Katie works as a vocational adviser.
“Then my husband and I had to write a story about us with pictures, about why we wanted to do it and about our family,” she said.
Through the agency, the Nelsons met with other surrogate parents, who shared their experiences. “Every surrogate mother that I met was such an amazing person because they had such a huge heart,” Scott said.
In October 2006, the Nelsons received the profile of a Colorado couple, referred to as the “intended parents” in a surrogate arrangement.
“My husband and I just knew after reading it this was the couple we could help,” Katie said.
In November 2006, the agency arranged a meeting of the couples. Facilitated by a mental health professional, the couples talked through the process. “We visited about our families, what our outlook was on this,” said Katie. “The whole conversation came very easily.”
The Nelsons, who have been married eight years, asked if they could be updated yearly on the babies’ progress and milestones in their lives.
The intended couple, who have asked not to be identified for this story, had no problem agreeing to that.
“Initially you’re concerned that the surrogate mother will care for the baby as well as you would,” the intended mother said in a telephone interview. “But after meeting Katie, that’s never been a concern. We feel very fortunate to have been paired with them. Katie’s been so great and so patient.”
As the surrogate mother, Katie also received a fee, paid in installments by the intended parents. The base fee was $20,000, Katie said, although she will receive somewhat more for having twins and because she is undergoing a Caesarean-section.
In January 2007, Katie and the intended mother began taking medications to prepare for the invitro fertilization, which took place in February at a Colorado hospital.
Approximately nine days later, a pregnancy test came out positive.
“I called the mom up and told her that she was going to be a mom again,” Katie said. “She was so excited. We both couldn’t sleep.”
An ultrasound in March indicated Katie would give birth to two babies, a boy and a girl.
In the fifth month of her pregnancy, Katie developed a bleeding problem and was taken to Mercy-Des Moines, which is well-equipped to deal with premature births.
Scott, the intended mother and the Nelsons’ family members have all spent time with Katie in the hospital. Scott and the twins visit weekly.
In the meantime, Scott, who works as kitchen manager at Hy-Vee East, has been “Mister Mom,” caring for the couple’s young sons and handling the housework detail.
“I never ever imagined that it would involve me like it has,” he said. “I kind of initially looked at this as Katie’s deal. Now I look at it that we’re doing the surrogacy as a couple. I definitely don’t regret any of it. I am extremely proud of my wife and think this is an absolutely wonderful deal.”
Katie returned to Mason City on Oct. 2 and will continue on bed-rest at home until the babes are born, which could be around Oct. 30.
The intended parents, who already have two young daughters, plan to be in attendance.
Aside from bed rest, which is difficult for someone like Katie who likes to keep active, this pregnancy has gone as easily as her first.
She does not foresee having any problems turning the babies over to someone else.
“From day one, I’ve known it wasn’t my babies,” she said. “We’re just hoping they’re healthy and they can take them home within a couple of days.”
She and Scott have made it clear to Blake and Jacob that the new babies aren’t coming home with them. They view the experience as a tremendous learning experience for their sons, who are seeing first-hand what it’s like to do something wonderful for other people you didn’t even know.
Katie mused about the impending delivery and about what she will look forward to the most.
“I think it’s the look in their faces when they first get to hold them that I’m going to enjoy,” she said, a tone of excitement in her voice. “And to see their kids with the babies.”
Surrogacy is an expensive option for parents:
MASON CITY — Surrogacy is a great option for couples who qualify for the service — and can afford it, a major agency spokeswoman said.
“It has to be a medical necessity,” said Fay Johnson, program coordinator for the Center for Surrogate Parenting (CSP) Inc. of Encino, Calif.
Couples must also be able to afford the cost, which Johnson estimated at $100,000 to $200,000.
They must pay the fees for the surrogate mother, the agency, physicians, agency psychologist, attorneys and hospital and travel costs.
Once that hurdle is met, surrogacy can be a win-win situation, Johnson said.
“Everybody wants the same thing. Everybody’s happy in the end.”
In most cases, the child is biologically the child of the intended parents, who are medically unable to have a child naturally. In other cases, a donor egg is used.
The surrogate mother is never the biological mother of the child.
In business for close to 28 years, CSP has helped with the births of approximately 1,380 babies, Johnson said.
The surrogate mothers are young women who have already had children of their own and had easy, healthy pregnancies. “They have somehow been touched by someone who can’t have a child,” Johnson said.
The surrogate mother earns a fee for her service.
Most couples stay in touch with their surrogates over the years, although it is not a requirement. The agency asks only that they send pictures to the surrogate of the baby at 6 weeks, 3 months, 6 months and a year.
To qualify, both couples must undergo physical testing and psychological assessment from an agency psychologist.
The surrogates must also be raising young children to which they gave birth.
Surrogacy has become increasingly popular since the mid-1980s, Johnson said. “People understand that this is an available option.”
When choosing an agency for a surrogate arrangement, Johnson recommends looking for an agency with experience and a good reputation.
“There are no bargains out there,” she said. “I think this is so huge and so important, you need to work with truly professional people.”
About half the agency’s couples come from foreign countries, from every continent, particularly Europe and Australia.
weezy wrote on Oct 7, 2007 9:32 PM: